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Have you ever looked around and thought, This isn’t where I thought I’d be? Maybe you imagined a different career path, a higher position, or a greater sense of fulfillment at this stage in life. Instead, you find yourself feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or questioning your choices. If this resonates, you’re not alone. The Weight of Expectations Many of us enter adulthood with a roadmap—whether it’s one we crafted ourselves or absorbed from family, society, or education. We set timelines: By 30, I’ll have my dream job. By 40, I’ll own a home. By now, I should feel successful. When reality doesn’t…

My Heart Story Every life tells a story, and mine begins by being born "blue" with Tetralogy of Fallot, a complex congenital heart defect. As a newborn, I quickly learned how much strength I needed, even to breathe, move and eat. I was born with a mountain to climb for even simple human experiences. As I grew up, I learned to to hide my scar, both the physical one on my chest and the emotional one in my heart. I longed to blend in, to be seen as 'normal' and brave, but the truth is that my hidden story was far too powerful to remain silent. Like many others with congenital heart disease, my…

It’s easy to scoff at the word ‘addiction’ when it comes to screen time. After all, our phones, tablets, and laptops aren’t drugs or alcohol, right? But the way they engage our brains tells a different story. Dopamine, the neurotransmitter that drives pleasure and motivation, is being hijacked by the rapid-fire stimulation of notifications, endless scrolling, and instant gratification. Dr. Anna Lembke, an addiction expert, explains that smartphones are designed to be addictive, reinforcing behaviours with rewards like social media interactions, akin to a slot machine's reinforcement schedule…

As parents, we spend much of our lives trying to anticipate and provide for our children's physical, intellectual and emotional needs. When they're young, we become their personal sherpas carrying backpacks filled with wipes, sunscreen, extra clothes, band-aids, favorite toys, books and snacks. As they grow into young adults, they probably do not want us to wipe their nose or need us to apply sunscreen for them. Yet, despite their desire for independence they probably still want someone to fix their problems. This transition can be hard for parents, too. We are still their parents, and we know…

As 2025 begins, I am noticing that my clients need a more resilient, generous way of repairing the disharmony they create. Saying I am sorry is not nearly enough especially if the hurtful remark, the sarcasm, the domineering posture has been ongoing. We all come into our relationships with character flaws - bad communication habits that came from childhood hurts. Ie.,” Nobody will ever get close ever again. “ “ I get to tell you everything that I think and feel just like my mother did " These reactions are defensive in nature and so automatic we barely notice the effect on our loved ones or…

I'm not so much of a "New Year Resolutions" person. I'm more of a "Create a Life you Like and Live it Everyday" kind of person. People come in to my office any time of the year, January or otherwise, to work on being happier, being more confident, being healthier, and being braver. What do you like spending your day doing? Being in nature? Being in front of a computer? Playing with your kids? And what are you actually spending your time doing? Listening to others vent? Commiserating about how hard life is? Numbing out on your phone? It's ok to do things you really want to be doing. Really. And…

Have you ever been intensely frustrated by not know what is causing you to experience nagging and uncomfortable emotions, seemingly out of the blue? We have all experienced this scenario. We are having a reasonably good day, perhaps even relaxing with friends, when we are suddenly overwhelmed by unwanted negative thoughts or emotions. Something in our mental process has caused us to become “triggered” to a negative thought or feeling, that could take hours or days to recover from. Identifying the causes of these mental triggers is a crucial first step in managing one's mental health and…

I remember 10 years ago training in Internal Family Systems and using it for myself and for my clients. It wasn't a technique that was on many people's radar. But I found it very helpful personally as well as professionally. It was great to have a positive silver lining for all the parts of the clients that they were not fully proud of. It was great to have a compassion-based method that worked to help people be more present and themselves. And it helped to process trauma. In Internal Family Systems we are looking at the individual as a sum of parts. It's kind of like that movie, Inside Out…

Did you know that many people are helped by seeing a Counsellor while going through developmental changes? In our lifetime we experience many developmental periods such as: Going through Puberty. Transitioning to Adulthood. Moving in with a Partner. Becoming New Parents. Empty Nesting. Caring for Aging Parents. Transitioning to peri-menopause and menopause. Transitioning to Retirement. Preparing for Death and Dying. These times in our life can be full of learning and change and so part of that is exciting. However, the learning curve can be so steep that things start to feel overwhelming…

Do you notice you are thinking (and caring) too much about what others are doing? Do you change often change your behaviour due to the influence of others? Are you cutting off friends due to their differing beliefs or values? Do you let your parents' comments influence your opinion of your romantic partner? Enmeshment is a psychological term that describes a blurring, or lack of, boundaries between people. Many times it occurs in families. Adult children engage in behaviours they don't want to because of their feelings of guilt about what their parents will think of them. Having an opinion…