The Addiction We Don’t Acknowledge

It’s easy to scoff at the word ‘addiction’ when it comes to screen time. After all, our phones, tablets, and laptops aren’t drugs or alcohol, right? But the way they engage our brains tells a different story. Dopamine, the neurotransmitter that drives pleasure and motivation, is being hijacked by the rapid-fire stimulation of notifications, endless scrolling, and instant gratification. Dr. Anna Lembke, an addiction expert, explains that smartphones are designed to be addictive, reinforcing behaviours with rewards like social media interactions, akin to a slot machine's reinforcement schedule.

The Frustration Tolerance Crisis

Frustration tolerance is our ability to handle discomfort, setbacks, and delays without immediately seeking relief. In the past, we had to wait—wait for a letter to arrive, wait for a slow internet connection, wait for our TV show to air. These moments of waiting allowed us to develop patience, perseverance, and adaptability. Today, we have the convenience of instant gratification at our fingertips, and our brains have become wired to expect it. And what’s the cost? A diminished ability to sit in discomfort, to process emotions without a digital escape, and to find joy in the stillness of being present. What happens when we repeatedly turn to screens instead of our own emotions? We disconnect from both our bodies and our inner selves. Physical movement, deep breathing, conscious awareness—these essential aspects of self-regulation are abandoned in favour of endless digital consumption. Anxiety and depression rises, frustration tolerance shrink, and our ability to emotionally regulate weakens. We stop listening to what our bodies and mind need—whether it’s rest, nourishment, or simply time to process thoughts—because we are too busy chasing the next dopamine hit.

Breaking Free: How to Reclaim Your Mind and Body

The good news? This cycle can be broken. But it requires intentional effort and awareness. Here’s how:

1. Embrace Discomfort

Challenge yourself to sit in moments of boredom or frustration without reaching for your phone. Allow your mind to wander, to process, and to feel without digital interference.

2. Set Boundaries with Screens

Create ‘tech-free zones’ in your home, such as the dining table or bedroom. Use apps that track or limit screen time to break the automatic habit of reaching for your phone.

3. Reconnect with Your Body

Prioritize activities that bring you back into your body—walking, stretching, deep breathing, or even just sitting in stillness. The more we practice physical presence, the more we regain control over our attention and emotions.

4. Delay Gratification

Train your brain to wait. Whether it’s resisting the urge to check social media, postponing a purchase, or simply sitting through a moment of boredom, delaying gratification strengthens frustration tolerance and emotional resilience.

5. Rewire Your Dopamine System

Swap instant digital rewards for longer-term, meaningful satisfaction—reading a book, engaging in deep conversation, practicing a skill, or spending time outdoors. Over time, these activities rebuild a healthier dopamine response.

We are not powerless against the pull of our screens. By recognizing how digital addiction is reshaping our frustration tolerance and emotional resilience, we can take steps to reclaim our presence, patience, and connection to the real world. The question is: Are you willing to sit in discomfort long enough to break free?