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Every couple is faced to some degree with fundamental differences in terms of beliefs and values. Successful couples are able to respectfully negotiate, comprise on or resolve difficult issues. Many couples, however, are unable to work past major differences despite their best efforts. Others attend to differences in a very mindful way, yet for a range of reasons may decide that they are too great to overcome. Solvable issues or perpetual issues? Dr. John Gottman, an internationally renowned marital researcher, has written an excellent book called The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work…

People often turn to their friends for support with difficulties in their romantic relationship and bluntly ask for their opinion. Rarely, if ever, does any good come from providing candid opinions about others’ relationships – particularly when the stakes are high (if they’ve been together for a long time or have children, for example). Some of the difficult-category questions we receive may range from ‘do you like my partner’ to ‘should I stay with them’ or ‘do you think they are cheating?’. The best general advice? Keep your unfiltered and unedited opinions to yourself. And if you feel…

Mindfulness can be defined as the action to observe what is happening while it is happening, in a non-judgmental and non-reactive way. While practicing mindfulness, you learn to pay attention to external stimuli (what you see, hear, touch, smell or taste) as well as internal stimuli (your body sensations, emotions and thoughts). One way to practice mindfulness is through mindful eating. Science tells us being intentionally and actively mindful has so many positive benefits on our psychological health. These include, but are not limited to; reduction of stress, reduced rumination, decreased…

Have you ever struggled with effectively communicating in a relationship? Do you often feel others aren’t listening well to you? Well – one of the best things we can do when we feel someone in our life isn’t listening to us well, is to focus on being a better listener toward them. Communication in our relationships is everything – and unfortunately, most of us aren’t ever formally taught how to communicate in an effective way. One of the key components of being a good communicator is being a good listener – and I’ve got 7 tips that can help! I encourage you to think about which tips you are…

Our technological world is rapidly expanding. Fifteen years ago when many teenagers were getting their first cell phones, they were only able to call and do simple texting messaging. Now, most adults and teens alike have a computer in their pockets. We are more connected than ever. But are we really? Of course, with any technological advances, there are positives and negatives. Here, we are going to be talking about social media in particular and how disconnecting from social media leads to more connections. Positives and Negatives of Social Media So why the big deal about social media use…

Managing Self-Critical Voices We all have that little voice in our heads. Sometimes it can be really helpful and motivate us to accomplish our goals, but other times it can be overly critical. When our self-talk becomes overly critical, it not only has a negative impact on our minds but also on our bodies as well as the people around us. So, it’s important to learn to manage our self-critical voices and practice being more self-compassionate Negative self-talk increases a person’s risk of experiencing mental health challenges. It increases people’s stress levels, makes them feel hopeless, and…

We often hear that we need to be kinder and less critical of ourselves, but that’s easier said than done. Often, our self-critical thoughts have been developed over so many years that we hardly even notice them happening anymore. Or, at times, we may believe we need this type of ‘tough love’ in order to motivate ourselves to be better (that we will be ‘soft’ if we are too kind to ourselves). This is untrue. Repeated criticism results in increased levels of cortisol and adrenaline, which leads to the body trying to protect itself by beginning to shut down (e.g., depression). So, it’s important…

Are you ever faced with a decision that feels impossible to make? Most of us probably have at one point or another. Sometimes this difficulty in decision making is a result of competing values. For example, you have a big work presentation tomorrow and you really value work, but your kid comes home from school and had a bad day and could use some support and you also value your family. This decision requires you to decide which you value more. For some, making that decision may be easy, for others, it’s less black and white. When we live in such a way that’s aligned with our values, we feel…

Since the beginning of COVID-19, a lot of you had to transition to working from home. Working from home has its positive aspects: more flexibility, more time available, fewer expenses, the possibility to wear more comfortable clothes, the opportunity to work everywhere: in a coffee shop, on your couch or even in your bed, the possibility to take care of children/pet/house chores during the day, etc. Even though it sounds good on paper, a lot of home-workers have reported feeling unhealthy and unbalanced since they had to make this transition. Tips to implement good habits and create a sense of…